Category Archives: Australia

a note about lightness & dreams.

Posted by

0

trogir, croatia - henri cartier-bresson

(trogir, croatia. henri cartier-bresson)

 

dear you,

writing from time to time has reminded me that i am not a transplant in the different cities i call home. though i often find myself poised and questioning what exactly do i seek in these places i inhabit, i do get this sort of relief that it is only anthropomorphic to feel this way. what remains constant apart from change, is that i have never stopped questioning this absence, or how you would describe it; being a dreamer.

with that many words unspoken, it does at times make me seem to be a difficult person to understand. with the bricks life occasionally throw at us, we sometimes build walls, not so much as to cage ourselves in, or perhaps shelter us from the harsh realities of life, but instead to see if anyone cares enough to attempt to break down these walls to just say hi or something. probably less dramatic, but hey you get the idea.

these days, i find myself agreeing with your proposition. i recall the times you would pontificate on the concept of cognitive loss; we all are born into this world not by choice but by fate, and with a void. when one begins with losing something so precious, despite not being able to find it immediately, it is important to not feel disheartened, but instead, to understand that we all have a missing piece in this puzzle. take comfort in the believe that someday, when we eventually grow older, tread further, and reconcile with that tug deep down when we recover this piece.

as your words finally begin to set in (after all these years), i sense a lightness in me. this feeling presents itself on a daily basis, and it is rather uplifting to be left feeling this way. it is of significance for one to be light like a bird and not so much as a feather, for there is a unique synthesis between the intellect and the emotion in the composition of lightness itself. to me, without dreams and the lightness of which it presents, i suspect that life in general, would be plagued with pestilence at its most distinctive dexterity. one would be left to pursue life in absolute monotony, at best seeking comforts in the materiality of the things, which would eventually melt into air. with the lightness of which dreams presents, life would not narrow expressions into sheer abstracts and figures, instead it would connect the visible threads with the invisible ones. perhaps this would add more ‘value’ into living.

despite having a vast collection of adjectives, the world works in strange ways that we cannot explain in words. as much as i would dislike to agree with it, sometimes things do happen without a reason at all. as i present myself with a vast array of options in life, the quasi-endless nature of some of these options, has at times forced me to go against the current, constantly wearing me down. perhaps it is time to stop fighting the current once in a while, and maybe drift along its path and enjoy the course.

eventually there will be a time when decisions are to be made, but i think i am ready as long as this feeling stays with me.

 

 

 
a.

stillness.

Posted by

0

20130402_220932_0

the xx, live.

one stands silently still and watch as the world goes by around him. engulfed in pure ecstasy, it is not difficult to imagine what, where, how & why when silence strike with precise clarity. how often would one draw silence from the unspoken and just feel contented being drawn together? it would be a waste if one refuses to accept this and breaks the silence. it takes a lifetime to understand that this silence is very rare indeed.

the xx – angels

i’ve discovered that, silence, is something that you can actually hear. if you listen closely.

a. 

not shaking the grass.

Posted by

0

IMG_1490(lake zurich, zurich. )

dear you,

‘no matter how far you travel, you can never get away from yourself.’

the notion of distancing oneself from ‘things’ in general, i presume is something that i have grown awfully accustomed to. i have traveled with much vigor, and once called the plane my ‘time-machine’, and of course you would understand why, you didn’t sign up for this but eventually ended up as the watcher, leaving all emotions tumultuous. boarding the plane weren’t routine, it was half as fancy as you’ve pictured them; lounge and all. when pictures remained inadequate, the setting stay crystal. but often the words to describe them prevail as cloudy, and the mood to be opposing.

these moments often portrayed themselves to be rather harrowing as one begin to comprehend the idea of constantly being on transit and melodramatic at times. so i left everything behind, and as i begin to deliberate over such moments, part of me tend to wonder if events would transpire differently if i did stay a little longer. and maybe if i had taken the more ‘stable’ path in life, would i be half as happy as i am now? i believe not. their dreams aren’t mine. i do want my heart to melt away into something unrecognizable and easily forgettable.

if one tends to leave part of his feelings behind in a place, i think my time travels will eventually leave me with barely enough to begin with. you enter the room like a distant memory these days, the water never hit you anymore. it is rather cliché to say that my life has changed, but i have grown to realize that within me, there is an enlarged capacity to take on battles and be the victor.

‘ sure i am this day we are masters of our fate, that the task which has been set before us is not above our strength; that it’s pangs and toils are not beyond our endurance. as long as we have faith in our own cause & an unconquerable will to win, victory will not be denied to us. ‘ – Sir Winston Churchill.

sure we all have priorities in life, and with each passing year, i keep saying this to myself ; ‘am older, yup. but am i getting any wiser? not quite sure.’ it does suck to constantly defend dreams and aspirations, but i also regard this as being important; one has to protect them to be yourself. yes i have been alone all this time, and i am truly happy, and it can only get better. i do know where i am going, and i am on my way. the hustle and bustle of the city and light are not boxing me in, the loneliest people in the world are the ones surrounded with the wrong company.

i will keep this clear. the road goes forever on and gone, and i am forever gone from yours.

a.

space + spaces.

Posted by

0

1e1aba4a614e52337cb847b343754733f3900554

‘emptiness which is conceptually liable to be mistaken for sheer nothingness is in fact the reservoir of infinite possibilities.’ – d. t. suzuki

1203_

dear you,

space, we live in space, or spaces. it embraces us, it shapes us. i have yet to understand it very well, given the implications of how things often unfold by chance. whatever you’re seeking, it won’t come in the form you’re expecting. in most cases, what we end up remembering is often not what we saw.

when i refer to space, i should clarify that i am not referring to the theory of space, the linear dimensions of it, but rather the cognition of space. the slightest pleasure or pain teaches us its malleability. we store many ‘things’ in space, or spaces. some of these add value, increasing it’s proportion, and some go missing, reducing never to prompt. what are we exactly storing in these spaces? are we merely adding space or multiplying it?

i came across an article on the new york times, the gist of it, highlighted how capitalism in contemporary age has established for most of us, a desire for unnecessary material things, in turn questioning if this process would increase happiness, as it took up both the physical and cognitive spaces. the author ended with a simple phrase, ‘my space is small, my life is big.’ i think the author was right. regrettably so i believe i fall under this context of acquiring material things.

does space shape character? i think it does, we all have our stories don’t we? if we were to clutter spaces with the insignificant. would we ever be able to embellish the things that are of significance? think hypothetically trying to find a needle in a haystack.

that aside, i do sometimes wonder, if i am shuffling between two spaces. one, merely to reconcile things, and eventually narrowing them down to a perfect rose-colored joy; my dreams and aspirations, the driving factor, the beauty of everything. the other, almost businesslike, constantly wearing me down, as if to prove that life isn’t half as good as i had mapped it, beckoning me to abandon the ambitions i’ve entertained, the fears and what holds us back. i do like the idea of striding between the two, and i want both spaces to bother me.

has my spaces increased? or have i merely added to them. i think it is time to reëxamine these spaces. worn from the addition to oneself, i seek multiplications instead. as with most things in life, the more you learn, the less you fear. that i refer to the practicality of life, not the academic facet. we mistake the idea of being mature when we are only being safe, we assume the roles of being responsible when we are only being cowards. life and love is a gift bestowed without asking for, rather than avoiding things, i think i should start to face them.

the poet once wished the new-born; ‘may you be ordinary’.

a.

notes from the perforated pages.

Posted by

0

Screen Shot 2013-03-11 at 9.52.01 AM

you made me confess the fears that i have.

but i will tell you also what i do not fear.

i do not fear to be alone or to be spurned for another or to leave whatever i have to leave.

and i am not afraid to make a mistake, even a great mistake, a lifelong mistake and perhaps as long as eternity too.

james joyce, a portrait of the artist as a young man

the art of literature is absolutely beautiful. for there will always be one true sentence i knew.

a.

l.

Posted by

0

795a986fbae7539240f4598b54a0054c50a44909

(sunset, stockholm.)

tiger got to hunt, bird got to fly;
man got to sit and wonder ‘why, why, why?’
tiger got to sleep, bird got to land;
man got to tell himself he understand.

but is the inevitability of just being a person.

everyone’s gotta do it. 

a.

through the looking glass_

Posted by

0

0511012_

‘ a quiet secluded life in the country, with the possibility of being useful to people to whom it is easy to do good, and who are not accustomed to have it done to them; then work which one hopes may be of some use; then rest, nature, books, music, love for one’s neighbor — such is my idea of happiness. ‘ – Leo Tolstoy

i am beginning to suspect, if there really is as many minds as there are to the heads that are supposed to contain them.

life is and will always be simple, and i am happy.

a.

place_

Posted by

0

dear you,
oh god.. where do i even begin? so i have been back in Perth for about 4 weeks and counting..  & i have to acknowledge that the transition from Copenhagen to Australia isn’t as smooth sailing as I would have like to think so. on hold are the halcyon days, spent in cafes with a nose in a book\ the wayfarer exploring cities with much vigor\ that curious eye finding everything rather peculiar, capturing moments on old film..

days in summer apt to linger, or so they say.. i guess it is time to stay focused.. as Carl Sandburg would satirically phrase it.. ‘there is an eagle in me that wants to soar, and there is a hippopotamus in me that wants to wallow in the mud.’
unfortunately for me, procrastination found his old friend. not quite sure if i should be proud of the old sport, or rather, even gloat about it.. but yeah.. you catch the drift.. celebrated my 26th last week.. getting older.. not sure if getting wiser though.

as much as i would have loved to stay focused on completing what i have initially set out to do, i found myself rather occupied these days running unannounced errands instead. sent my car to the workshop this morning for panel repair and a new paint job. tough luck! i got into a minor traffic accident two weeks after I got the new car. the driver was text driving and blindsided me at a corner.
so anyways, i should get back to work..

what is in a song?

best,

a.

the sniper’s log_

Posted by

0

040812_

 

‘ night, the beloved. night, when words fade and things come alive. when the destructive analysis of day is done, and all that is truly important becomes whole and sound again. when man reassembles his fragmentary self and grows with the calm of a tree. ‘        – Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

 

- who am i

- where have i been

- what am i doing here

- where am i going

 

night spells polysyllabic words to the tempo of quick flowing blood rivers: supernatural, appurtenances… by the river i sat.

 

 

 

a.

københavn; mit liv

Posted by

0

i’d like to blur the fixed boundaries that we humans, in our self-certainty, tend to draw around everything within our reach. - h. höch

my place_ the story begins;  ( @grønnegårdsvej /frederiksberg )

the empty water-fountain_ ( @ amalienborg palace )

Image
entitled; gleaming lights of the souls – yayoi kusama (@ louisiana museum of modern art /denmark)


ImageHM the Queen of Denmark’s 40th Jubilee; Margrethe II of Denmark & HRH the Prince Consort of Denmark; Henrik ( @ kongens nytorv )

Image

Imagediving board; elmgreen & dragset ( @ louisiana museum of modern art /denmark)

Imagesnowy mornings ( my room view @ frederiksberg )

Image
quaint streets of helsingør ( /denmark )

the little mermaid; ( @ langelinie )

\jewish museum entrance; daniel libeskind

nyhavn_

some snippets. more to come.

a.

is this it_

Posted by

0

‘ you only live once; or so they say. ‘

the addition of another to a singular number isn’t really a beckoning figure to be honest.

fortunately, one plus one in my instance, did not turn out to be an astronomical figure.

‘u’ and ‘i’ are both in ‘futile’, but then again so is ‘beautiful’

‘a solitary laugh is often a laugh of superiority – graham greene’

a quote so concise and yet its presence is prolix.

don’t read me, for you will fail.


i think my bicycle tires are getting rather deflated in some sense.

reason must have been my personal preference of traveling with much vigor,

and not bestriding along the machinery of life .

it is not as frustrating as you would often like to think so.

i still look up in the night sky once in a while, with deep admiration

wondering if we would eventually smear it with the smokestacks, like we have already done so with everything else.

you do it so you can forget that you’ve ever had that one beautiful memory,

i do so it so i could at least try sleep with my eyes open.


oh what a paradoxical put i suppose.

it seems as such, the further i travel, the more i become backed with a hangover,

the more completely disappointed i become at one point or another.

it must have something to do with the mass, having an influence over the destiny of most things i witness,

but it will only be best that i drop this match into a glass of water before the fire consumes me.

not all is bad though, there are the great ones, you know who you are. ;)


if home is where the heart is,

i for certain will have to address my letters to the stars.

with all decay or disbelief, the meaning of life will always rearrange itself.

don’t lose hope, but be surprised dear reader,

well at least this was what i was taught from the principle of entropy.

i am not the enemy, we just disagree.

embrace today, for the train tracks you’re traveling on lack the curvature.

and remember this; you cannot grab hold of anything with a closed fist.


i dislike goodbyes.

so see you later.

thanks for everything.



a.


theattic_

theattic_

theattic_

theattic_


canvasdrip_

canvasdrip_


roa@formgallery_

roa@formgallery_


filmprojector_

filmprojector_


inthemirror_



insert title here_

Posted by

0

down to the wire, this was the very result of an entirely unplanned process_

the love of all decay_

an art project i did at the university of western australia (symbiotica)_

 

 

‘ the limitations of human love;

when we think for one moment about how inestimably dear life is,

we witness the extinction and destruction of another life,

we soak up the hurt for every problem until we become the hurt ourselves,

so we stop the contemplation,

in doing so is akin to laying our heads down and dying as slowly as life passes.

we eventually come to a point where it’s a fight,

for how much tragedy we can care about, it become purely coincidental ‘

-inspiration; astral weeks.





rather hyperbolic i know. but isn’t that what our urbanization is all about after all? a paradoxical result of wanting to make our world a better place and enrich our lives for the better.

‘ would we then go; i don’t want to live in a stinking world like this anymore because there is no attention paid to the earthly law and order no more. singing the melody in the rain. ‘ (a clockwork orange)

judgement is difficult, don’t take me too seriously, for ‘earth’ without ‘art’ is ‘eh’.

some snippets i stitched, enjoy.

‘ save of don’t save? ‘ – worm art from asile w. on Vimeo.